Speed Dating Tips for Guys

By Emily | November 15th, 2023

Dating is time-consuming. Finding the right person means introducing yourself to new people one at a time, learning about their likes and dislikes, going on dates, and then deciding if they are a good fit. It takes time, and there’s no guarantee that your investment will be worth it.

That’s where speed dating comes in. It’s fast by name and fast by nature. You still meet new people and make new connections, but everything is quick, and not a single moment of your valuable time is wasted! 

There’s an art to effective speed dating, a knack that helps the process to run smoothly. In this guide, we’ll show you what it is with some top speed dating tips for men that could improve your dating game.

Preparing for Speed Dating

Three simple words: always be prepared. It’s some of the best dating advice for men that you will hear, and it makes a massive difference to your chances of success.

Some men see speed dating as a cheat code for dating, something that doesn’t require any effort but will always deliver results. Others just see it as a way to have a good time, and it is, but if you want results, you need to be a little serious as well.

So, let’s start our speed dating tips with some quick preparation advice:

• Dress Appropriately: You don’t need to wear a tuxedo, but you shouldn’t rock up in your work overalls either. Dress as if you were heading out for a night on the town. Choose clothes that are comfortable and clothes that make you look good.

• Groom Yourself: Trim your hair and beard and wear your best cologne. Making a good first impression is all about smelling good and looking clean. 

• Know What You’re Doing: Read about the event beforehand, learn where to go, what to do, and how you’re going to get there and back. If you’re attending a CitySwoon event, we have lots of blogs and articles to help you, including some excellent online dating tips for men that will ensure you’re ready.

• Relax (without chemical assistance): Nerves are expected, but try to relax and stay calm. Don’t resort to drink and drugs, as it may backfire. 

• Prepare Questions: Think about what you will ask your dates. Plan some open-ended questions and avoid being too personal or political.

• Manage Expectations: You might meet someone; you might not. Just remember that there are always other dates and other events.

Mastering First Impressions

You only have a few minutes to make a lasting impression, and in many cases, people will make up their minds about you in the first few seconds. To make a good first impression, remember the following: 

• Smile
• Make eye contact
• Try to relax
• Display confidence 
• Stay positive
• Listen to what they say

One of the best speed dating tips for guys is to be yourself. Don’t try to be the funny guy if that’s not you. Don’t lie and pretend to be something you’re not. Your date will appreciate you more if you are confident and at ease with yourself.

Effective Conversation Strategies and Icebreakers

Ask a question, smile, nod, respond where appropriate, and say something relevant.

That’s the key to a good date. It’s all about showing that you’re interested in what they have to say. If you simply reel off a list of questions, it suggests that you’re not listening. Or worse, it may look like you’re just checking boxes and don’t actually care.

Sharing personal stories is always helpful. It gives you a chance to open up. The trick is to avoid making it seem like you’re directing the conversation back toward yourself. This can be difficult, but you just need to give them an opportunity to speak, such as by asking for their opinion. That way, it feels like you’re sharing a story and not just talking at them.

Finally, get comfortable with small talk, but don’t make it your aim. Use it as an introduction—a way to delve deeper. For instance, if you begin by mentioning the weather and they complain about how they got wet when walking their dog that morning, make the conversation about their dog, as opposed to continuing to bemoan the bad weather.

Handling Rejection and Moving On

You will meet more people and make more connections when speed dating, but unless you are the local Casanova, you will also get more rejections.

Don’t take them too seriously. It doesn’t necessarily mean that they don’t like you and it definitely doesn’t mean you’re too ugly or too awkward. It just means that you didn’t find the right formula in the very limited time that you had.

It’s 5 minutes, after all, and you can’t be expected to nail every minute of every date.

Just take it on the chin and move on to the next date. If you fail to get any matches, book another event and try again. 

Speed dating, like everything else, is something that you will get better at the more you do it. So, if it doesn’t work for you the first time around, simply take what you have learned into the next event. 

Follow-Up and Next Steps

If you follow these speed dating tips and match with someone, it’s time to follow up.

Don’t be too eager by contacting them moments later and definitely don’t hassle them with endless messages. Give them time and breathing space and remember that you might not be the only person they matched with.

When you eventually connect with them, reference something that happened during your date. It’s a great way to break the ice and show them that you remember them.

Summary: Make Better Connections at Speed Dating Events

One of the most common questions we’re asked is, Does speed dating work? Obviously, the answer is a massive and convulsive yes, but you will only get out what you put in. 

If you show up in dirty overalls, half-drunk, and with a disgruntled and disinterested attitude, it’s probably not going to work for you. But if you’re well dressed, well groomed, and positive, and you take all of the above dating tips for men into account, it will definitely work.

If you feel like you check all the boxes above and are ready to get cracking, check out our speed dating events in a city near you.