The Dos and Don’ts of Speed Dating for Mature Singles: Expert Tips and Advice
By Emily | November 15th, 2023
Speed dating is often incorrectly seen as a young person’s game, but it is just as beneficial for seniors, if not more so. When you’re young, you have all the time in the world. You don’t mind wasting a little time, especially if it means getting to know new people and looking for a connection.
As you get older, time becomes more precious, and patience wears thin. You don’t want to waste the entire night on a blind date who turns out to be a creep or weirdo. You also don’t want to be matched up with friends of friends, just because you’re single and one of your nearest and dearest thinks that’s a problem.
Speed dating for mature singles is booming right now and with good reason. You can cycle through numerous dates in a single night, and unlike those match-making dates arranged by persistent friends, you’re in full control throughout the night.
If you’re a single senior looking to try something new, keep the following senior speed dating tips in mind.
Dos of Speed Dating for Mature Singles
Whether you’re at a virtual or local speed dating event, make sure you do all the following:
Do dress to impress
They say that first impressions are everything. Well, in speed dating, they mean it. You don’t have time to make up for a bad first impression, so do everything you can to make a good one.
Wear clothes that make you look smart and sexy while still adhering to the dress code (if there is one). In other words, if it’s a casual event at a bar, don’t rock up wearing a tuxedo or a black sequined evening dress.
Do come prepared with conversation starters
Prepare some questions in advance to make every speed date go smoothly. Choose questions that are fun and open-ended and remember that you’re trying to get to know them and make a connection—it’s not a job interview. Cheesy chat-up lines are never a good idea either.
So, “What drives you in your life and career?” is a good option, as is “If you could invite any historical figure to a dinner party, who would it be?” On the other hand, “What’s your job, how much do you make?” and “Are you widowed?” are a little more direct and intrusive.
Do be open-minded and have a positive attitude
Unlike dating in your 30s and 20s, you’re probably a little less forgiving as a senior. You’ve had your fair share of time wasters and you don’t want more. But you’re also more understanding and know that a bad first impression could just be a sign of anxiety.
It’s important to use this attitude and let it prevail. Be open-minded and positive. Don’t dismiss them as soon as they sit down. If you are receptive to what they have to say and to the idea of spending time with them, the date will go smoothly. You may find that you actually like them.
Do listen and engage
You shouldn’t spend the whole speed date asking questions. You’re not a quizmaster. Instead, listen to the responses, ask follow-up questions, provide your own opinions, and answer any questions that they have.
Do choose a suitable singles meetup
There are many types of speed dating events, including speed dating for older adults, speed dating for professionals, virtual speed dating, and more. Choose ones that not only fit your demographic but also target the people you want to date.
Don’ts of Speed Dating for Mature Singles
If you enter a senior speed dating event with an open mind, a relaxed demeanour, and a positive attitude, there’s not much that can go wrong. You’re just testing the waters with a bunch of singletons after all, and if it doesn’t work out, there’s always another event. But it’s important to give the event every chance, and for that, you should remember the following:
Don’t arrive late
Going back to what we said above, speed dating is all about making a good first impression, and showing up late won’t do that. It could also mean you end up missing the event entirely. So, make sure you get there on time!
Don’t talk about past relationships
Remember, you’re there to have a good time, meet singles, and see where things go from there. You’re not there to talk about your previous relationships and moan, cry, or get angry about exes. Keep past partners out of the conversation.
Don’t obsess over rejections
Sometimes, you have a good chat, get to know someone, and then find out they don’t want to follow up with you. It happens, and it’s important not to let it get you down.
Maybe they found someone else with whom they had a closer connection. Maybe they want someone at a different place in their life. They could even disagree with something political or religious that you said and just didn’t want to say anything at the time.
Either way, these things happen, and you need to move on.
Don’t be negative or judgmental
Singles are not there for your benefit. You’re not a talent show judge and they are not the talent. Remember that, and don’t be too judgmental. If someone isn’t for you, just wait until the time is up and see what the next person is like.
The beauty of speed dating is that you only have a few minutes with each person, so there’s no time to get bored with boring dates.
Don’t drink too much alcohol
Speed dating for older singles is usually more reserved than events targeted toward younger daters, but there’s still a lot of alcohol flowing, and when you combine this with all the nerves, tension, and excitement, things can get out of hand. One or two drinks are okay if it helps to calm your nerves but don’t go overboard.
Don’t forget to follow up with your matches afterward
The whole point of speed dating for singles is to find a match. You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but if you find someone that you like, follow up with them. If not, there are always more events and more singles to meet.
Speed dating is experiencing a resurgence right now. In Australia, search terms like “speed dating near me” and “singles speed dating near me” are trending higher than they have done for years, and much of that is driven by older age groups.
So, while speed dating for seniors can be very different from speed dating in your 20s, 30s, or 40s, there is no shortage of events, singles, and opportunities. Keep the above tips in mind and check out Cityswoon to discover an exciting singles event near you.